Love is Something I don't understand
by DivinityofDarkness
Summary: It's a KaiTyson fanfic. Tyson tries to help Kai with his life, before Kai decides to end it tragically. Can Tyson succeed before it's too late?
1. Realization

**This is my first fic, so please review so I can improve!**

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**Love isn't something I understand**

"**Why can't you ever lighten up!" The indigo-haired Granger roared at his captain, best friend and secret crush, Kai Hiwatari. But the dual haired enigma blatantly ignored all of Tyson's accusations and rather flirtatious advances. Takao was all but tweaked at Kai's behaviour: Why did he have to be so indifferent!**

"**The answer, Tyson, is beyond me," Kai responded in a deadly quite tone, his head dipped so that his long bangs shaded his face. "I don't know how to be anything more than a cold, heartless weapon, remember?" Something in his voice astounded Tyson; it was full of an unrecognized emotion that he had never heard before coming from Kai.**

**The older teen sounded… abused. Like the way a small, innocent child would after he'd been beaten. In an immediate response to his captain's change of behaviour, Tyson found himself placing a hand on the latter's shoulder in a gesture of comfort and reassurance, but it was bluntly refused when Kai shrugged it off.**

"**Leave – me – alone," Kai found himself saying in a monotonous voice that at the same time resonated with danger. "Kai," Tyson persisted, moving forward yet again and placing a firm grip on Kai's shoulder. It was amazingly boney beneath his fingers; Kai lacked the masculine physique of the other Blitzkrieg Boys, favouring a more slender frame instead. "You need to let us in if we can ever help –" Tyson was rudely interrupted in mid-sentence when Kai jerked himself away from him.**

"**I DON'T NEED HELP!" Now it was Kai who shouted at Tyson, trembling with something other than rage. "Especially not yours! Can't you see! I'm the insensitive, arrogant prick everyone thinks I am! So leave me alone!" Suddenly, Kai spun on his heels and dashed madly out the front door, his scarf trailing out behind him like a white flame.**

**/ Midnight :**

**Tyson was scouring the now deserted night-time streets of Bakuten for any signs of the agitated Russian, after a constant haranguing on the part of the other G-Revolution members for hurting the feelings of the said Russian. He didn't even know Kai HAD any feelings. That was the biggest mistake he made. In believing that his captain was as emotionless as he claimed to be, Tyson had unwittingly peaked the emotional roller coaster that Kai's life had become to an all time high.**

**Tyson hadn't expected Kai to react no negatively to his offers of help; he hardly even knew what he did wrong! Apart from his outburst at Kai more than eight hours ago, there was little else that he had done to set the dual haired enigma off. It dawned on his that Kai had recently been rather edgy, and it took a ridiculously miniscule amount of _Anything_ just to irritate him.**

**More than once over the past three weeks, Kai had surreptitiously snuck off out of the blue and not returned for hours at a time, even not till the next day. He rarely spoke to anyone, preferring to isolate himself in some shadowy part of the dojo and completely ignore the rest of the gang. Tyson wondered silently why Kai had changed so much since the end of last year's tournament.**

**Many people didn't see Kai the way he did; they believed him to an evil, heartless, merciless prick like the rest of the Blitzkrieg Boys; that he cared for no one but himself, doing just about anything to get what he wanted. But that was far from the truth. Kai was rarely seen by anyone, because he felt no need to be seen when he was not needed. He possessed an extraordinary ability to disappear and reappear whenever someone desperately needed his help, and his self-command earned him a profound respect and admiration. In any case, not a single one of the Russian bladders had an ounce of evil in them.**

**Then there was Kai's genuine way with words. With just a brief sentence or even just a passing comment, Kai could make you feel as if you were on top of the world, or he could bring you back down to earth so hard you could feel yourself crashing on solid ground. He could make you reexamine yourself more than you would ever have done in your entire life, or make you feel so proud that nothing and no one could make you feel any smaller.**

**He and he alone took the time to single out a particular trait of a particular person, and make them see it in a way only he could, because he took the time to look for it. It gave him the uncanny ability to make other bladders understand something about themselves that they'd never understood before. Anyone could tell you this; Miguel, Raul… With barely any exchange of words Kai had changed their lives for the better.**

**But ironically, everything seemed to be going wrong for the Russian. First was his grandfather's escape from the Russian Federal Prison, then the $5000 contract on his head placed by the maniacal Boris. It got worse when Kai's recently discovered family, consisting of his mother and twin sister, was brutally murdered by someone speculated to be Voltaire.**

**His world was crumbling and falling to pieces; pieces that couldn't be put back together, but yet Kai still refused to burden anyone else with his problems. And because of that, the madness and the stress was eating away at him, diminishing his once powerful desire to survive pull through at all costs. Tyson knew that if he could find his captain soon, Kai would loose all will to keep on fighting, and the life that Tyson so deeply cherished would be no more than a very painful memory.**

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**Me: Yay! My first fic! **

**Kai: It was stupid. I'm not suicidal. Tala is.**

**Me: But Tala isn't the main character, so be quiet before I _do_ kill you.**

**Kai: grumble**

**Tyson: Leave her alone. I want to see how it ends.**

**Me: Thanks! Read and Review Please -!**


	2. What Next?

**Chapter 2:**

**I'm doing the second chapter, it was supposed to be a part of the first one but it was too long so I separated it. It was meant to be one whole chapter, but I decided to split it into two… Hope you enjoy! We left off with:**

_**His world was crumbling and falling to pieces; pieces that couldn't be put back together, but yet Kai still refused to burden anyone else with his problems. And because of that, the madness and the stress was eating away at him, diminishing his once powerful desire to survive pull through at all costs. Tyson knew that if he could find his captain soon, Kai would loose all will to keep on fighting, and the life that Tyson so deeply cherished would be no more than a very painful memory.**_

**I need your help, but I can't admit it:**

"**Everyone takes him for granted. It's starting to take its toll on him," Ray had said when he noticed Kai's worn out and exhausted expression. His first observation was only too true. Their captain was an integral part of their lives, but they had grown so accustomed to the part he played that they often failed to realize that it was mentally wearing down Kai, despite that fact that it hardly showed.**

**Kai was wise beyond his years, empowered by unmatchable years of experience and astounding psychological strength; and surprisingly, little people knew just how fragile and vulnerable he really was. It would take years to take down the barriers Kai had built around himself during his years in the abbey, but now Tyson found himself willing to take as long as needed to help Kai realize that he wasn't alone in the world.**

**After two hours of non-stop searching, Tyson had located neither hide nor hair of the missing captain. His legs wobbled unsteadily as he grabbed onto the metal railings on the bridge overlooking the riverside practice area they so often practiced in. Tyson stared unblinkingly at the full moon overhead, wondering how something could be so beautiful even when something so horrible was going to happen.**

**_I can't let Kai die… I can't… I have to continue searching… _But Tyson could go on no more. Driven to desperation in the hopes of finding Kai, Tyson cried out in exasperation, his cry carrying for miles and miles in the still night air. Gripping the railings so hard his knuckles so hard, Tyson stood there shakily, mentally berating himself for letting Kai down like this.**

"**Oh Kai… I'm so sorry…" Tyson's voice was hoarse from the scream, but with all his heart he prayed that wherever Kai was he'd hear it and come home. _Please… Just come home…_ Tyson couldn't hold back the tears much longer and silently they fell, cascading down his cheeks and seemingly dancing in the silver moonlight.**

"**If you keep that up the whole neighbourhood will wake up," a rather smug voice said from behind Tyson. Daring a backward glance, Tyson's eyes widened in shock and horror as Kai stepped into the light of the streetlamp looming over them. His face bore bloodied gashes, his clothes were torn and ripped, and Kai was avoiding putting any weight on his left leg. But still he approached Tyson with a smirk played out on his delicate features.**

"**Wha – What happened to you?" Tyson managed to choke out as Kai leaned on the streetlamp for support, sliding down slightly. "I wanted to kill myself, and I nearly got my wish. I finally found a use for those brainless back-alley thugs. " Kai said everything as if being suicidal was just an everyday event for him. "But then… Dranzer…" His voiced trailed away into nothing more than an inaudible whisper, followed by a deep moan of pain.**

**As Kai slumped onto the floor, Tyson moved in front of him and took his captain's hands in his, ignoring the calloused bruises and cuts beneath the fabric. "Kai… Why did you save yourself?" Tyson's voice rose barely above the sound of Kai's own harsh and pained breathing. "Because Dranzer… Said that I had something else to live for…" Kai struggled to respond, lifting his head to stare into Tyson's eyes. The lamp-light flickered and reflected in his mesmerizing rose eyes. They closed shut abruptly as their owner started to succumb to the darkness, but Kai strained to stay awake.**

"**But I don't know what it is," came the finishing sentence. "Maybe I do," Tyson murmured softly as he drew nearer to Kai. Their lips met gently, Tyson too afraid of rejection, Kai too weak to respond. As Tyson pulled away, he ran a slender hand down Kai's painted cheeks. A soft sigh escaped from the lips parted in pain, and slowly they closed and curved upwards into a gentle smile. **

"**She was right," Kai uttered softly. "She knew what I didn't… That I loved you…" Rose eyes lifted skywards and locked on to dark chestnut ones. "But it's too late… It's all gone…" Kai's last words were full of remorse and regret. "I'm sorry, Tyson. I'm sorry…" Crystal tears poured freely, streaming down the painted cheeks and mixing with the fresh blood, merging into a river of red. **

"**Shh…" Tyson whispered as he wiped the blood and tears away. "It's okay… I forgive you…" But Kai didn't reply. Though the tears did not cease to fall, Kai made no sound to give Tyson any indication that he heard him. "Kai?" Tyson repeated himself, in a silent desperation that his captain was not… Another small smile, and the tears ceased to flow, but still Kai didn't respond.**

"**Please… Not when I need you… Not when I love you… Don't leave…" Tyson urged Kai, taking the slender shoulders slowly, and gripping onto them as if his life depended on it. "Kai…" In silent anguish Tyson hung his head, ashamed that he could not save his love from himself, but no tears fell. Kai died happy, and that was all he could ask for. A low and muffled voice disrupted his thoughts.**

"**I'm not dead, you idiot. How could you think so poorly of me?" Again Tyson looked up, and again he saw that small smirk. He pulled Kai into a tight hug and gently trailed kisses along Kai's neck. Kai chuckled softly, stroking Tyson's back lovingly. "I'm not going anywhere, so you can let go now," Kai said slowly, and he was barely able to hide his grimace when Tyson pulled away.**

"**I love you, so don't you dare do that again," Tyson breathed out onto Kai's lips as he pressed their foreheads together lightly. As Tyson pulled Kai in for another kiss, Kai felt his heart soar. This is what true happiness was about: being in the arms of someone you love, and who loves you in return. Their lips danced together in sync as they both gave their heart to their loves. They were both as happy as they could ever want.**

**And for now, Kai knew that was all he needed to live.**


End file.
